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date: Wednesday, October 31, 2007
title: Thoughts;confession.
time: 10:14 AM
Was toking to Lisa on the phone and she suddenly told me that 30 Oct was her best friend 2 year death anniversary.With that, I somehow thought about one of my best friends, Fad. And 25 Oct was her first year death anniversary. She died during her sleep. I still remember how shock I was when Nick told me thru sms that she died. It was during the school end when I was on the bus, he smsed me and say Fad died. I couldn’t believe it, but no way he was joking about people dead. Called him, confirmed and I was really in total shock. I didn’t know what to do, I stone in the bus for a while and my tears just suddenly fell of from my eyes. I couldn’t control it, it just flows down. Till now, I miss her a lot. I miss the days when we were gossiping around. I miss the days when we make fun of ‘someone’. I miss the days when we were out shopping. I miss the days when we were in the modern dance (with nadz they all in 2002). I miss the days (esp on Monday) when we were crazy about Raul (soccer player) when he score goals for his club, we will just scream loudly in the class. I really really miss doing lot of stuffs with her. Really I do. But looking back after we graduate from O levels, I felt I am such a very bad friend of hers. We din contact each other after we grad. I stop smsing her and calling her. We just rarely msning each other. But it only lasted for a few months. And slowly we lost contact of each other. A few months back before her death, she suddenly smsing me and msning me. That’s when I felt that she still remember me and still treat me as a friend. And there we go again, like we did last time… Gossiping, crappings and chatting. Met her on Orchard road quite a lot of times, she keep asking me to go out with her (and with Charmaine and Shantini they all) But I just hate Charmanine and Shantini and refuse to go out with them. And so we din meet up. That was the last time I contact with her before her death. I SHOULD HAVE call her and told her the truth that I dun like going out with them and SHOULD have meet up with her one day and go shopping with her only. BUT I DIDN’T. I was lazy to call her and meet her out. I took it way too granted. And now, I don’t even have a chance to do it now. I felt that I am such a bad friend. I hope she forgives me and hope that she is happy in her other world. From that on, I told myself that I am not going to take my friends for granted. I will be there for them whenever they need me, I will love them forever. Because you will never know what gonna happen next. Fad , I miss and love you very much. You will always be my best friend, and you will always be in my heart. Forever. Labels: thoughts |